Chapter 7 Part 4 (2)在线视频

Case 2

titled

Comprehensive comparative effectiveness

and safety of first-line antihypertensive drug classes

a systematic multinational large-scale analysis

Let’s first analyze this case’s structure

This introduction is composed of 4 paragraphs

It falls into the 3 moves of the general structure of introduction

What’s known

what is unknown

What is their aim and how will they do

To understand the analysis better

first please allow me to introduce the background

of this article

Uncertainty remains about the optimal monotherapy for hypertension

with current guidelines recommending any primary agent

among the first-line drug classes ...

Randomised trials have not further refined this choice

These two paragraphs describe what is known

and first paragraph

Patients and physicians

have a wide range of pharmacological options to treat hypertension

but little guidance on which specific first-line agent to initiate

This sentence presents the general topic

For patients and physicians

there are many pharmacological options

but with little guidance on the first-line agent

Thus the authors provide evidence for their study

Claim importance

These two sentences

further support the topic by citing the endorsement

from ACC/AHA in 2017 and action from ESC/ESH in 2018

The second paragraph

synthesizes prior research

that further supports the need to study the research problem

Reviewing items of previous studies

Now let’s move to the third paragraph.

The first sentence

The 2017 Cochrane Review of first-line therapy for hypertension

an update from 2009

found no new RCTs to include

goes further on the idea mentioned in the second paragraph.

that there is little guidance

on which specific first-line agent to initiate

for treating hypertension

This statement naturally pushes ahead the unsolved problem

the gap what is unknown

Thus

there remains uncertainty and

unfortunately

we do not have contemporary knowledge

of the real-world comparative effectiveness

of common antihypertensive drugs

with respect to outcomes—

and the safety trade-offs among these options

Now let’s move to the fourth paragraph.

the fourth Para.

also the last paragraph of the introduction

is What was done

In this section

the authors described a “novel approach”

in contrast to prior research on the topic

This novel approach

used massive data across several countries

and synthesised tens of thousands of comparisons

with analytic techniques to minimise residual confounding

In contrast to a single comparison approach

the present study provides a comprehensive view of the findings

and their consistency across populations

drugs and outcomes

and by design avoids the harms of publication bias

or overemphasising a single observational analysis subject to p-hacking

Structure Analysis

This introduction section moves from what is known

what is unknown the unsolved problem

and finally to what was done

by indicating their novel approach

and reporting their results

Language Features

First about the length

The total word count of this section is 381

spreading over four paragraphs

Second about the tenses used in each move

Have

Endorse

Emerge

When it goes to the previously published observations

the past tense is used

Enrolled evaluated were done

In the last paragraph

to formulate the study’s objective

the past tense is used

we developed

This novel approach used

For the results of the study

the present tense is used

LEGEND-HTN provide We report results

Word Appreciation

Sentence 1 good transition

Thus

there remains uncertainty and

unfortunately

we do not have contemporary knowledge of the real-world

comparative effectiveness of common antihypertensive drugs

with respect to outcomes

The first good choice of word is the adverb thus

It shows that what the authors are about to mention

is the result or consequence of what they have just mentioned

The synonyms for thus include therefore

so

hence consequently

These adverbs are good transitions

Transitions are words or phrases

that provide a connection between ideas

sentences and paragraphs

Transitions help to make writing flow better

They can turn disconnected pieces of ideas into a unified whole

and prevent a reader from getting lost in the storyline

the second sentence

Accordingly

We developed the open-science

Large-scale evidence generation

and evaluation across a network of databases for hypertension

study to compare

common antihypertensive drug treatments by a systematic

large-scale analysis across nine observational databases

from the observational health data science

and informatics dis tribute data network

This novel approach used massive data across several countries

and synthesized tens of thousands of comparisons

with analytic techniques to minimise residual confounding

Accordingly

as mentioned

is a transition providing connection between paragraphs

This is the first good choice in this paragraph

Let’s move on

We developed…

generation and evaluation…

The next sentence starts with this novel approach

this is a demonstrative

For demonstratives

we have words this singular

these plural

and that those

They convey physical closeness

and distance and emotional distance

From physical distance

This/These are most commonly used to point to things

and people that are close to the speaker or writer

That/Those are most commonly used to point

to things and people which are not easy

to identify in a situation

For emotional distance

this/these are used to refer to things

that we feel positive about

that we are happy to be associated with

or we approve of

You can feel the subtle difference of the expression

if this is substituted by that or the

Another good choice is the word novel

It is similar to new

but means more than new

New and novel come from the same Indo-European root

but by different paths

New is a Germanic word coming from Old English

novel is based on Latin

If something is novel

it means something is of a new form or nature

something previously unknown

Case 3

first structure analysis

Let’s first analyze this case’s structure

This introduction is composed of 2 paragraphs

It falls into the 3 moves

of the general structure of introduction

To understand the analysis better

first please allow me to introduce the background of this article

Observational studies have reported an association between

low serum vitamin D levels

and elevated risk of cardiovascular disease CVD events

but such studies cannot prove causation

because of possible unmeasured confounding

So the authors conducted a meta-analysis

of randomized clinical trials

that tested the association of vitamin D supplementation

with reduced CVD events and all-cause mortality

The first paragraph describes what is known

The first sentence presents the general topic of this paragraph

Observational studies

have reported an association between low serum vitamin D levels

and elevated risk of cardiovascular disease events

The next three sentences provide evidence for their topic

Claim importance

Thus the authors provide enough background information

and set the context for this article

This second paragraph can be divided into two parts

One is what is unknown or the gap in the current study

and the other is what was done

Although Vitamin D level supplementation has increased

in primary care settings in the US

there is still no clear statement

to prove the causation of vitamin D supplementation

in reducing major adverse cardiovascular events

because of possible unmeasured confounding

Then the article moves to the third part what was done

The previous randomized clinical trials

are limited and inconclusive in the assessment of vitamin D supplementation

and cardiovascular disease events

but several recent large-scale trials provide

plenty of data for the assessment

Therefore the authors conducted a meta-analysis of all RCTs

they could collect to evaluate the causation

between vitamin D supplementation

and the prevention of cardiovascular disease

Language Features

Now let’s analyse the Language Features

First about the length

The total word count of this section is 223

spreading over 2 paragraphs

Second about the tenses used

in each move of the Introduction Section

To show that the studies began sometime in the past

and is not yet complete present perfect is used

Have suggested

have been linked to

have increased

has been

have not been recommended

To show the facts

present tense is used

are expressed

has effects

To formulate the objective

past tense is used

conducted

Word Appreciation

Look at these three adverbs

specifically

additionally

also

In scientific articles

adverbs can be used effectively to demonstrate a point

Many students find it easy

to collect information from the literature

for the introduction section of their manuscript

However

linking different facts together to produce logical

clear text is often difficult

In this paragraph

the authors use the adverb specifically

to induce the citation of the first group of literature

to support the topic sentence

Additionally

at the beginning of the next sentence link similar facts

Also in the next sentence placed before the verb has

These three adverbs connect the three sentences

and produce a logical and clear context for the topic